Increasingly, research shows that older adults can benefit in myriad ways from the companionship of an animal.

Physical health benefits

Pets seem to help us stay calm in the midst of stress:

- Reduced blood pressure and heart rate. Some research shows improvement even when the “pet” is fish swimming in an aquarium!
- Strengthened immune system. One study found an increase in an infection-fighting blood factor.
- Fewer pain medications. Adults who had pet therapy while recovering from joint replacement used 50% less pain drugs than those who did not.

Mood and activity benefits

For elders living alone, pets may provide a kind of companionship essential to well-being. Older pet owners are believed to be more active than their peers. One study even showed that older adults with pets go to the doctor less often than those without.

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Money matters are often intensely private. And no one wants to infringe on a family member’s independence. Yet it is through (sometimes expensive) financial mishaps that you may learn of changes in your parent’s memory and thinking.

Signs of a problem

Diseases that affect memory also tend to impair arithmetic skills and reasoning. That’s why money trouble can suggest the onset of dementia. Be alert for the following changes:

- Difficulty counting change or balancing a checkbook
- Frequent late payment of bills
- Confusion about banking transactions
- Unusual or repetitive purchases
- Accusations that others are stealing from them
- Investing in sweepstakes or other “get rich quick” schemes

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For most family caregivers, frustration and guilt are common, as is anxiety. These feelings are normal and reasonable under the circumstances. And it’s not realistic to eliminate negative emotions. Caring for an ailing family member IS emotionally taxing, especially in the case of memory loss.

But you can avoid amplifying a downer mood. According to stress and coping research, you can reduce your distress by concentrating on the present moment, the here and now.

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Source: SeriousIllness.org

Technologies abound to help us stay connected with loved ones. There are also many options to support your relative in living independently. Here are some options in the areas of safety and health.

Personal safety and home security

• Personal medical alert: Wearable devices that call for help. Most require the push of a button. Some can detect a fall automatically. Others can be used even when away from home.
• Fall detection: Video systems that scan the bottom 12 inches of a residence. This protects privacy but reveals if a person has fallen to the floor.

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Source: SeriousIllness.org

Even those of us who enjoy cooking have days when it seems like just another chore. And when you are juggling the needs of an ill relative, it can be an even greater challenge to maintain enthusiasm.

Cooking for Caregiving recognizes that caregiving is love and that food is how we often show our love. The goal of this nonprofit organization is to present options that mean less cooking hassle for you as a family caregiver and healthier meals for your relative.

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This is not a unique story. It’s told over and over. Many of the details and most of the emotions are shared by thousands who choose quality end-of-life care at Hospice & Palliative CareCenter.

The power in Madlon Glenn’s story lies in the very fact that it is not unique. It is the same story. It is a story of caring, compassion and comfort.

Madlon’s Story
Madlon’s mother, Hawley Chambers, suffered a serious injury in January 2008. At first, her family was hopeful that she would survive, but after two months and two unsuccessful surgeries, they called Hospice.

“The Hospice nurse gently broke the news to us that our mother would never recover,” Madlon says. After accepting the care and support from Hospice, the family’s story of pain and despair became one of peaceful acceptance.

“Hospice knew what to do for her and for us,” Madlon says. “They were always so kind. And we were grateful for the option of having around-the-clock care at the Hospice Home.”

When Madlon and her brother, Thornton “Butch” Chambers, visited their mother at the Hospice Home for the first time, they were amazed to see her looking so well. “She was sitting up for the first time in two months, her hair was fixed and she’d had a manicure,” Madlon says.

But the intense level of care Mrs. Chambers enjoyed during her time at Hospice went deeper than a beauty makeover. “She was frightened in the hospital but not at Hospice,” her daughter says. “She was never alone and she seemed more relaxed. She was at peace.”

With Hospice’s help, Mrs. Chambers’ family members found their own peace. As Madlon tells the story, “Hospice makes the patient’s last days mean something and prepares the family to let go.”

For more information about Hospice & Palliative CareCenter, visit http://www.hospicecarecenter.org!

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Source: SeriousIllness.org

You may be entitled to claim your relative as a dependent. This requires that:

- The individual’s income was less than $3,650 in 2010. “Income” includes Social Security and pension benefits. Also, proceeds from investments or withdrawals from retirement savings plans.

- You paid more than 50% of your relative’s support. He or she does not have to live with you. Support expenses include food, clothing, housing, and medical care. Also, transportation, recreation, and other essentials. If he or she lived with you, include fair rental value for your family member’s share of the lodging.

Many relatives qualify. Your parents and siblings. Other family relatives, step relatives, and in-laws. Or anyone who lived with you all year.

If others paid some support expenses, a deduction is still possible. But only one person can claim it. And everyone who shared expenses must sign a multiple support agreement.

You may be able to deduct medical expenses.

• This includes expenses paid for yourself, your spouse, or a dependent relative. Or for a relative who would have qualified as a dependent but had too much income or filed a joint return.
• The expenses must add to more than 7.5% of your adjusted gross income (AGI). For example, if your AGI is $40,000, the first $3,000 of expenses doesn’t count.

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For more information about Hospice & Palliative CareCenter, contact Ann Gauthreaux, public relations director, at 336-768-3972, or see Hospice’s website at http://www.hospicecarecenter.org!

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Source: SeriousIllness.org

The search for meaning appears to be a uniquely human trait. Along with hope, having purpose can sustain us through even the darkest circumstances. Noted psychiatrist Viktor Frankl spent many years in Nazi concentration camps. During his ordeal he established that a sense of purpose and a goal for the future were essential to human existence. They made the difference between surviving that tragedy with grace and dignity or succumbing to bitterness and despair. When faced with a diagnosis of serious illness, we can learn lessons from Dr. Frankl’s observations. Although we cannot control many of the external events of our lives, we do have some control over our attitudes and how we approach even a life-threatening condition. This perspective in turn can have a significant effect on the quality of our life and how we experience our days, whether we have many days left or only a few.

Finding purpose in life, both in the past as well as the present day, can transform a serious illness into a deeply meaningful event. Indeed, many family caregivers and people diagnosed with terminal conditions have said that the illness brought them gifts along with the sadness. Reflection on one’s life and one’s contributions and achievements is often cited as a source of insight into the meaning of it all.

Many people struggle with identifying their contributions and achievements and tend to count only the financial and material aspects. Few of us can be a great statesman or a brilliant architect who leaves behind a legacy to be seen and remembered by the world. All of us, however, leave behind a very meaningful legacy in our friends and families. The way we have lived our lives, the values and principles that have allowed us to touch the hearts and souls of others, and that we have passed on to our children and family, is a legacy that is every bit as important, and one that will live forever as it is passed down from generation to generation.

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For more information about Hospice & Palliative CareCenter, contact Ann Gauthreaux, public relations director, at 336-768-3972, or see Hospice’s website at http://www.hospicecarecenter.org!

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There’s a reason rivalries resurface when siblings share in elder care. According to Francine Russo, author of They’re Your Parents, Too!, the trigger is an awareness that time is running out. It often hinges on the desire to resolve unconscious needs for parental attention. Perhaps it’s a need to feel as important as another sibling. Or to feel forgiven. Or to feel capable.

When old issues operate beneath the surface, the result can be lots of emotion and little constructive progress.

What to do:

- Check in with yourself. Are you overly engaged in caregiving out of the hope for approval? Or underinvolved because you were “the baby”? Recognize how your perspective may affect your role in your parent’s care and your response to your siblings.

- Don’t blame your sibs. If you feel that Dad overlooks you, you may be right. Your parent may be unfair. This is not the fault of your siblings, however. Similarly, if you are the “favorite child,” try not to abuse that privilege. Instead, look for common ground with your siblings. Acknowledge your parent’s foibles.

- Treat your siblings as adults. If you don’t operate according to old family patterns, your siblings are less likely to do so too. Meet them as they are today. At a minimum, agree to put aside sibling issues to focus on the care of your parent. Use the forum of a “family meeting” for discussion. Hire a facilitator if problems persist.

- Get support. You may not ever receive the love you want from your parent. Your siblings may repeat old patterns. Accept these realities if they occur, and find connection in other places. Try a support group for family caregivers. Or consider individual counseling for help in letting go of old hopes.

For more information about Hospice & Palliative CareCenter, contact Ann Gauthreaux, public relations director, at 336-768-3972, or see Hospice’s website at http://www.hospicecarecenter.org!

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Hospice to Provide Walking Meditation Labyrinth As a Spiritual Tool for Rest and Reflection

Hospice & Palliative CareCenter invites the public to experience its 6th annual walking meditation labyrinth, which will be set up in the agency’s Williams Education & Counseling Center (Building 121), located at 101 Hospice Lane in Winston-Salem from January 18-21 and on January 23.

The portable canvas labyrinth – designed in the style of the labyrinth found on the floor of Chartres Cathedral, a 13th century gothic cathedral in France – was created by the Winston-Salem Labyrinth Project.
“Dating back thousands of years, labyrinths have long been used as a place for rest and reflection,” explains Katie Cyre, manager of Hospice’s Complementary Therapies (CT) Program.

The CT Program offers Music and Art Therapies, as well Gentle Touch Therapies as part of patient and family care, grief counseling, and staff support.  These therapies enrich the total care of the patient, family member, and bereaved person, building upon the holistic philosophy of hospice care with therapeutic interventions that honor the mind, body, and spirit of each person.
“The journey in and out of the labyrinth is often viewed as a metaphor for life and provides opportunities for release, renewal, and insight,” Cyre says.
A new offering for 2011 is “Comfort for the Journey,” a workshop for those who are grieving the death of a loved one.  Sessions will be held on January 18, 6:00 – 7:30 pm, and on January 20, 11:30 am – 1:00 pm.  Workshops include a brief introduction to the labyrinth and a guided labyrinth walk.  There is no fee for the workshops; however, advance registration is requested.  To register, call 331-1348.
The labyrinth will be open to the public on the following dates.  No registration is required to walk the labyrinth.
•    Wednesday, January 19, 12:00 – 5:00 pm
•    Thursday, January 20, 1:00 – 7:00 pm
•    Friday, January 21, 12:00 – 7:00 pm
•    Sunday, January 23, 2:00 – 4:00 pm

“Our hospice campus serves as a place of respite and support for those seeking to gain comfort and understanding in their life journeys,” Cyre adds. “We offer the labyrinth each year with the hope that it will prove to be meaningful in the lives of those who visit.”

For more information about the labyrinth offerings, contact Katie Cyre at (336) 331-1331.

Since 1979, Hospice & Palliative CareCenter has been committed to providing quality medical, emotional, spiritual, and social support to patients and families who face a serious illness – regardless of diagnosis, prognosis, or treatment.  Today, Hospice & Palliative CareCenter provides these services in a 13-country area.  Hospice’s Grief Counseling Center offers bereavement services to families of Hospice patients as well as grief counseling to the community at large. Hospice’s Carousel Center offers pediatric palliative care to infants, children and their families.

For more information about Hospice & Palliative CareCenter, contact Ann Gauthreaux, public relations director, at 336-768-3972, or see Hospice’s website at http://www.hospicecarecenter.org!

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